How do you boil a toad?
You gradually turn up the heat in its place of comfort.
It does not see it coming. The environment seem to get more averse, more uncomfortable but the toad remains, why? first, see how much it’s invested in this place, how much time it already gave to reach this point, how much invested it already is, this is where its come to know. What once was a place of comfort. Surely, this water getting hot will soon pass. It would soon go back to its old ways, it’s not that bad, it will stop, it will soon stop, this too shall pass, yet it gets hotter. Sounds familiar? We are not much different from the toad.
Come down your high horse. Bring down your nose. Reduce yourself to a toad. Maybe you’ll have a chance of survival.
I would rather have nothing than have something mediocre. This has always been true all my life, yet as I now get older, I catch myself dangling mediocrity because leaving it for nothing just seem like not the right thing to do. What then do you do? improve the situation from mediocre to ideal, or leave situation if no improvement or change your statement and accept you will infact take mediocre instead of taking nothing, how sad.
While you might want better, it is hard to jump ship. You don’t know if you’ll land on water, land on land, or land on a landmine, you don’t know. Neither does the toad.
In Behavioral Finance, it is a psychological fact that people would forfeit future gains to prevent present loss. It means if you are given a choice to collect $50 in two years but you have to give up $30 today, you’re more likely to say no. Let’s try again. It means if you are told to lose $50 today instead of lose $70 next year, you’re more likely to say no. More and more people lose $70s instead of giving up $50. A loss is not a loss, there’s levels and layers to losing, a lose lose situation is not equal.
In Finance, statistics show a person is more likely to pour more money into a bad investment than forfeit their loss and go invest in a different venture. Do you know how con artists made wealth in the old days? Are you familiar with Cash Cows? how about a Whale? Not the animal but a cunning terminology. I’ll move on from money talk but lets get this understanding. Con artists in the old days, 1920s and so, they did not seek to con two hundred people, no, they seek to con one person two hundred times. You know why? it is easier to get one person to pay multiple times than it is to get multiple people to pay one time.
If a toad has experienced and survived its first wave of change to water conditions, it is more likely to stay and “survive” the next wave. Rinse repeat.
This should not be confused with “the grass is greener on the other side”. That is a lack of gratitude. This is “this grass is poison, and I’m getting out.”
A few of us would jump no matter what. Some of us would only jump if we know for certain what we’re jumping to, is it better than where we are jumping from? At the end majority of people would go down with the ship. Because, somewhere between them contemplating whether to jump or not, somewhere between them analyzing what they’re jumping into, somewhere between what they’ve invested and what would be lost, they remain in the boiling water until they are too weak to jump out.
The situation has taken the better part of them, sucked out their energy and pretty much owns them and rescue never comes. You should be concerned. You should be scared. You should be very concerned. We are not much different from the toad after all.
Look around your situation. where are you the toad? in what situation in life is the heat getting turned up? Where are you feeling uncomfortable? Your feet running fast but your body isn’t moving. What is slowly, continuously, irritating you of no fault of your own, than your acceptance of it?
All hot water does not turn boiling. All warm water does not turn hot. Have a plan should it get hot. You’re dead should it turn boiling.
This has been the downfall of many toads. Who’s to determine if it reaches boiling? who’s to permit the toad to jump out except itself? how have you trained yourself?
Find comfortable waters. Waters you do not want to jump out of, well, actually it is not what you want to do but what you have to do as responsibility to self. So find waters you should not jump out of, waters you don’t have to jump from. Peaceful, calm, healthy, flowing water.
We’ve already established leaving is not easy. Instead of leaving, some people react violently when another person keeps turning up the heat. It is easy to understand some people would not like being treated as a toad.
But, always remember, it does not matter whether you’re treated as a frog, a penguin or a beloved toad, if the water is uncomfortable, leap. It is your God given right and ability. No need to turn violent, you feel suffocated?
Go where is comfortable for you. Where breathing comes easy for you. Where survival is a bit easier. If you can’t find one, create one. Create the atmosphere where survival is easier and do your best to not bring in someone who is a water boiler. Because water boilers seek out toads yet toads rarely recognize who is and who isn’t a water boiler. Do you understand? water boilers seek out toads yet toads rarely recognize who is and who isn’t a water boiler.
Only the water holds the secret. And only the senses of the toad can receive said secret. It is now left to you to believe your senses and respond accordingly. But would you believe it’s time to leap? Leap forward? into the nothingness. Not knowing whether you’d land on water, land or on a landmine.
You could leap to better, yes, you could leap to worse. Growing up, you’d hear the adults say, “from frying pan to fire”. From worse to worst. That’s why some take extra time to confirm they’re leaving worse for good, not worse for worst. Yet, action takes a certain belief.
You’ve been predestined by God. You’ve been predicted by statistics. You choose where to belong.
Would you believe you can rebuild?
Would you believe God can restore the lost time — if you can choose to survive long enough?
Would you visualize a better future for yourself than the boiling, uncomfortable water you’re in?
Would you rather have nothing than have something mediocre?
Be honest with yourself, what are you able to do?
If you can do all things, and everything will work together for your good (if you can only choose life), if you know all this, when they tell your story, what would they say?
Are you familiar with the donut experiment? I learned about this many years ago, Researchers show fully functioning adults are more likely to take the stale donut that is in front of them — read that again, stale donuts, donut that’s been out for a couple of days, fully function humans like me and you are more likely to take and eat that donut than choose to go without and wait for a maybe fresh donut. Do you understand? Don’t underestimate the pull of what’s available to you, don’t underestimate the environment you find yourself in.
We are not that different from the toad after all. We stay where we are, we take what we can get right now. Who wants to go through the pain of going without? who wants the burden to continuously say no when it is so easy to succumb to what’s in front of you.
Statistics say what you think you will do is different from what you will do. But they don’t know your strength. You have freewill but they dont think you’ll choose different. Are you an outlier or are you the predicted?
I ask you, who are you? who God has said you are — because He’s given you strength to do all things, including going without or are you who statistics predict you will be? Who are you? Where do you stand? What will be true for you?
Would you rather die on your way to Canaan or would you excuse and tolerate Egypt? Who are you? A simple toad? A typical predicted beloved toad?
The boiling water can be a relationship, it can be a friendship, it can be a workplace, it can be how a country treats people. Don’t take the heat, get out the kitchen.
Do not invest too much in one place. Do not invest too much in one thing. Heck, do not invest too much in one person.
Always Be Moving. Always be ready to move when the environment changes. Stay Alive at all cost. Keep life worth living, at all cost. Burn bridges if they lead you to hell, at all cost.
Society frown on people who run from stuff, (yet) society look down on (dead) toads. Think for yourself.
To escape or not to escape.
If you could, what would you do?
Statistics say you would stay, because only the brave escape. I say you are brave and the stats are wrong about you.
If you could, what would you do?
Be Brave. Survive. Leap Forward. And, leave water boilers alone!